Mary Winkler - How to Get Away with Murder
The case of Mary Winkler sends a very interesting message. Mary, after serving 12 days in jail and 2 months in a mental health facility, was put on probation for the remainder of her 3-year voluntary manslaughter sentence. So a year and a half after murdering her husband, she was living her life with all the freedom afforded the rest of us, except she couldn't travel or spend time with her kids. And now, less than 2 and a half years after pulling the deadly trigger, she has custody of her kids! It's home sweet home for Mary Winkler - sans a troublesome husband, of course. Wow! That was less painful than going through a divorce and having to sell the house, split the assets, fight over the 401k, and spend sleepless nights battling bitterness and resentment. Disciples of Mary Winkler now have a new approach: take action and get it over with...permanently. Then blame it on the heat of passion. Passion over...finances???
Regardless of whether or not justice has been done in the Mary Winkler case (which it hasn't), the real problem I have with the case is the essential message it sends: that it's ok to kill your husband over the smaller, everyday struggles in your marriage. If your marital communication isn't working well; if your attempts to work out your differences are not adequately progressing (be it in sex drives or finances or how to discipline your kids); if you're just fed up for the day - you now have leave to murder your husband. Literally. Was Mary Winkler in mortal jeopardy? No. Was Mary Winkler in imminent danger? No. Did she fire on her husband in self defense? No. One minute her husband was laying in bed resting. The next he was bleeding to death, suffering much more physical agony than any American whose life ends on death row, as we mock justice by endlessly fighting to the last straw to ensure murderers like Richard Cooey don't experience even a twinge of pain in their deaths. So how did Mary Winkler receive such a light sentence for murdering her husband?
Enter the "spousal abuse" card. Back in the day, "spousal abuse" meant leaving bruises on your spouse. In 2007, we have redefined spousal abuse as requesting your wife to dress in a way that you find sexy but she finds undesirable. What ever happened to communication skills like saying, "Honey, I'd rather not wear that. Can we find something we would both enjoy?" But actually, as you read the transcript of Mary's March 24 2006 statement, the issues at hand were not the sexual ones paraded before the Oprah crowd. The issues on her mind were the nagging she received over finances and the small criticisms that exist in many marriages. So in the 21st century, if your wife doesn't like being taken to task over her bad financial recordkeeping, there is no need to expect her to communicate with you to resolve the conflict - the courts have essentially ruled that she has the right to get up early the next morning and kill you while you're laying in bed. We'll all sleep better with that knowledge! And since you won't be alive to tell your side of the story, she can work public sympathy with the spousal abuse card. And her only inconvenience will be a few months in custody and a few years of probation, after which she will be an eligible (and still young) woman looking for a new husband. Essentially, the courts have ruled that you can kill your spouse for a difference of opinion, and only receive a slap on the wrist for doing so.
But wait! Maybe there really was spousal abuse here. A defense psychologist testified that Mary Winkler was depressed and showed classic symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. Of course, the only logical explanation for this stress is that she was abused by her husband. She couldn't possibly be suffering this stress over the guilt of murdering her husband and the prospect of never seeing her kids again. Naw! That would be...logical. And we're not a logical people! But then, how far do we take the current psychological victim paradigm? Do husbands need to watch their backs any time the wife is disgruntled? What if she's in a bad mood from PMS, or going through the change of life or post-partum depression? Does that excuse murder? What if you accidentally say something that she doesn't like? Better sleep with your bulletproof vest.
Keep in mind that when Mary Winkler was first interviewed by the Orange Beach Police Department in Alabama, she was asked, "Now I know, couples are going to have squabbles, that's typical, that's normal, but y'all didn't have any major, major problems going on?" to which Mary replied, "No." So by Mary's own admission, the murder of her husband was not the result of a "major" issue. We can forget the spousal abuse card.
Mary Winkler's husband never got a chance to defend himself in court. Mary Winkler's husband never got a chance to shed light on Mary's contribution to the couple's troubles. No, he is forever labelled in the eyes of Oprah-worshiping mankind as an abusive, sexually perverted husband who obviously deserved it - a view based solely on the testimony of the woman who murdered him. His last words were to ask his wife "Why?" She didn't even have the decency of telling him she had an issue. Just sneak up on him, explode in murderous anger, blame it on a high-heeled shoe, and the Oprah crowd will say, "Awwwww - poor thing. We don't blame you for ending this human's life. He obviously wasn't fit to live." Apparently Mary Winkler took her marriage vows literally, "till death do us part" !
What if Mr. Winkler slept with a gun beside his bed, and had woken up in time to defend himself? If he had shot first in self-defense, do you think any American court would give his testimony the time of day? Do you think he'd have custody of his children 3 years later? Do you think Mr. Winkler would be on probation now? No, Mr. Winkler would be viewed as another Scott Peterson. He'd be rotting away the rest of his life in jail with no possible parole.
Who knows what secrets about their marriage that Mrs. Winkler buried with her dead husband? Who knows what illuminating testimony Mr. Winkler carried to the grave? Who knows how closely Mary's one-sided testimony actually represented the true situation of their marriage?
All we know is that soon, you might meet Mary Winkler (or a disciple of her methodology) in the checkout line. If you're in front of her and slowing up the line, pray she isn't within reach of a shotgun.
Regardless of whether or not justice has been done in the Mary Winkler case (which it hasn't), the real problem I have with the case is the essential message it sends: that it's ok to kill your husband over the smaller, everyday struggles in your marriage. If your marital communication isn't working well; if your attempts to work out your differences are not adequately progressing (be it in sex drives or finances or how to discipline your kids); if you're just fed up for the day - you now have leave to murder your husband. Literally. Was Mary Winkler in mortal jeopardy? No. Was Mary Winkler in imminent danger? No. Did she fire on her husband in self defense? No. One minute her husband was laying in bed resting. The next he was bleeding to death, suffering much more physical agony than any American whose life ends on death row, as we mock justice by endlessly fighting to the last straw to ensure murderers like Richard Cooey don't experience even a twinge of pain in their deaths. So how did Mary Winkler receive such a light sentence for murdering her husband?
Enter the "spousal abuse" card. Back in the day, "spousal abuse" meant leaving bruises on your spouse. In 2007, we have redefined spousal abuse as requesting your wife to dress in a way that you find sexy but she finds undesirable. What ever happened to communication skills like saying, "Honey, I'd rather not wear that. Can we find something we would both enjoy?" But actually, as you read the transcript of Mary's March 24 2006 statement, the issues at hand were not the sexual ones paraded before the Oprah crowd. The issues on her mind were the nagging she received over finances and the small criticisms that exist in many marriages. So in the 21st century, if your wife doesn't like being taken to task over her bad financial recordkeeping, there is no need to expect her to communicate with you to resolve the conflict - the courts have essentially ruled that she has the right to get up early the next morning and kill you while you're laying in bed. We'll all sleep better with that knowledge! And since you won't be alive to tell your side of the story, she can work public sympathy with the spousal abuse card. And her only inconvenience will be a few months in custody and a few years of probation, after which she will be an eligible (and still young) woman looking for a new husband. Essentially, the courts have ruled that you can kill your spouse for a difference of opinion, and only receive a slap on the wrist for doing so.
But wait! Maybe there really was spousal abuse here. A defense psychologist testified that Mary Winkler was depressed and showed classic symptoms of post-traumatic stress disorder. Of course, the only logical explanation for this stress is that she was abused by her husband. She couldn't possibly be suffering this stress over the guilt of murdering her husband and the prospect of never seeing her kids again. Naw! That would be...logical. And we're not a logical people! But then, how far do we take the current psychological victim paradigm? Do husbands need to watch their backs any time the wife is disgruntled? What if she's in a bad mood from PMS, or going through the change of life or post-partum depression? Does that excuse murder? What if you accidentally say something that she doesn't like? Better sleep with your bulletproof vest.
Keep in mind that when Mary Winkler was first interviewed by the Orange Beach Police Department in Alabama, she was asked, "Now I know, couples are going to have squabbles, that's typical, that's normal, but y'all didn't have any major, major problems going on?" to which Mary replied, "No." So by Mary's own admission, the murder of her husband was not the result of a "major" issue. We can forget the spousal abuse card.
Mary Winkler's husband never got a chance to defend himself in court. Mary Winkler's husband never got a chance to shed light on Mary's contribution to the couple's troubles. No, he is forever labelled in the eyes of Oprah-worshiping mankind as an abusive, sexually perverted husband who obviously deserved it - a view based solely on the testimony of the woman who murdered him. His last words were to ask his wife "Why?" She didn't even have the decency of telling him she had an issue. Just sneak up on him, explode in murderous anger, blame it on a high-heeled shoe, and the Oprah crowd will say, "Awwwww - poor thing. We don't blame you for ending this human's life. He obviously wasn't fit to live." Apparently Mary Winkler took her marriage vows literally, "till death do us part" !
What if Mr. Winkler slept with a gun beside his bed, and had woken up in time to defend himself? If he had shot first in self-defense, do you think any American court would give his testimony the time of day? Do you think he'd have custody of his children 3 years later? Do you think Mr. Winkler would be on probation now? No, Mr. Winkler would be viewed as another Scott Peterson. He'd be rotting away the rest of his life in jail with no possible parole.
Who knows what secrets about their marriage that Mrs. Winkler buried with her dead husband? Who knows what illuminating testimony Mr. Winkler carried to the grave? Who knows how closely Mary's one-sided testimony actually represented the true situation of their marriage?
All we know is that soon, you might meet Mary Winkler (or a disciple of her methodology) in the checkout line. If you're in front of her and slowing up the line, pray she isn't within reach of a shotgun.
